Radical Self-Care During the Holidays: Setting Boundaries and Finding Joy
EP. 25
Discover the transformative power of radical self-care and intentional holiday mindfulness in this episode of the Mae B Mindful Podcast. Host Hannah Mae shares actionable insights on navigating family dynamics, managing holiday stress, and breaking free from traditions that no longer serve you. Learn how to set boundaries, nurture yourself, and create meaningful connections during the holidays. Tune in for practical tips, personal stories, and empowering advice to revolutionize how you experience this festive season.
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Episode Transcript:
Welcome back to the Mae B Mindful Podcast! I’m your host, Hannah May. I’m a mother of six, conscious birth instructor and educator, spiritual growth facilitator, and certified hypnotist. This podcast is about inspiring hope, expanding awareness, and raising consciousness to revolutionize how we live and experience our lives. Expect thought-provoking episodes each week, drawing from my personal transformation journey, my healing work, and the experiences of others. I hope this podcast is informative, refreshing, and instrumental in your soul’s evolution and growth. Let’s jump right in!
Hi friends! Welcome back to the Mae B Mindful Podcast. I’m Hannah May, and today’s episode is dropping on Christmas Day. Merry Christmas from my heart to yours! I love Christmas and everything it represents. I love all the holidays—their meaning and what they can kindle in us when we pause and reflect. Often, they can inspire deep gratitude.
That said, holidays aren’t always easy. Depending on family dynamics, personal expectations, or others’ demands on us, they can bring stress. Some people genuinely love the holidays, but for others—especially those in recovery or dealing with trauma—holidays can be triggering. I want to explore how we can nurture ourselves through this season, allowing us to enjoy the experience more fully.
Family gatherings often bring up old patterns and unresolved feelings. I remember visiting my mom when she lived by the beach in California. Despite my usual commitment to healthy eating, I’d find myself standing in her pantry with a spoon in the Nutella jar, asking, "Why am I doing this?" It wasn’t until I tuned into my inner self and recognized the unresolved energy behind those actions that I stopped turning to food for comfort. Once I met myself in those moments and attuned to my needs, the urge to binge disappeared.
This experience taught me the importance of self-awareness and radical self-care. Sometimes, taking care of ourselves means breaking traditions, which can stir criticism or judgment. When we prioritize ourselves, we may disrupt others’ comfort or routines, but it’s crucial to honor what we need. For some, that might mean skipping certain family events or creating new traditions that feel safer and healthier.
Boundaries are a vital part of this process. A friend once shared how every holiday gathering with her family resulted in conflict, particularly with a high-conflict sibling. She struggled with setting limits and feared the fallout of excluding that sibling from gatherings. But we owe it to ourselves to create environments where we feel safe and supported.
Sometimes, radical self-care might mean taking a walk during Thanksgiving meal prep, as I once did. Stepping outside, breathing, and grounding myself transformed the day. Such small acts can have significant impacts. They remind us that our well-being is within our control.
The holidays often highlight patterns of people-pleasing and codependency. Many of us feel obligated to meet others’ expectations at our expense, but true self-care involves listening to what we need and setting boundaries accordingly. It’s about filling ourselves up so we can show up for others from a place of fullness rather than depletion.
At the heart of this is the idea of service—what can we bring to a situation? Approaching gatherings with a full heart, without expectations of reciprocity, allows us to stay grounded and present. Expectations, as the saying goes, are premeditated resentments.
When navigating family dynamics, having a backup plan can be invaluable. Whether that’s setting time limits or creating an exit strategy, it’s okay to prioritize your needs. For example, if you know a visit typically becomes overwhelming after two hours, plan to leave before reaching that point.
Ultimately, self-care during the holidays isn’t selfish; it’s essential. Sometimes, criticism of healthy boundaries comes from those who struggle to set their own. While their reactions may be projections, we’re not responsible for their feelings.
As the holidays bring up emotions and patterns, it’s an opportunity for reflection. How can we shift focus from seeking approval to creating meaningful connections? How can we align with our values and create lasting positive imprints for ourselves and our families?
Whatever your holiday season looks like, I hope it’s full of love, nurturing, and gratitude. Take this time to pause, reflect, and plan how you want to move forward into the new year. Thank you for tuning into the Mae B Mindful Podcast. Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a review—it helps us grow and reach more people. For more information, resources, and exclusive content, visit maybmindful.org.
Until next week, when I bring you another thought-provoking and inspiring topic, take care!